The main reason I never got to it... or really anything else... politics.
The P4A just ended yesterday. $2 Million raised! Amazing! Participating in the mostly wonderful nerdfighter community and decreasing Worldsuck was so needed for a boost.
But I was watching the news today and the pick for Secretary of State is out.
The CEO of Exxon.
.
.
.
Not that all the other appointments to the Trump administration haven't been horrifying.
But the fucking CEO of Exxon Mobil is going to be the Secretary of State.
A very long political rant incoming...
So, let's go back.
For many years now I've felt like there was this huge vulnerability no one was talking about in regards to the kinds of people who will be elected for big offices into the future. With mainstream media being 98% about entertainment and B-B-BREAKING NEWSSSSSSS that isn't news and flashy graphics and no real fucking substance about important things or objectively educating the populace, I've assumed that it would only take one opportunist celebrity with some money to commandeer the government. Because what matters these days is name recognition and entertainment. Nothing else. Policy is essentially useless in this climate of popular entertainment.
Arnold Schwarzenegger ran for governor of California and as soon as he ran I knew he would win.
Because name recognition and entertainment.
It mattered that he was THE GOVERNATOR.
Nothing else.
It was just a matter of time that something similar would happen with the Presidency.
So, when Trump ran, the series of thoughts that followed:
Oh, well he's gonna win.
Shit, I hope not.
The news media would have to give him no time and carefully break down what's wrong with him.
... That will never happen. They'll want ratings and give his belligerence all the time in the world.
He's gonna win.
But out of the blue there was this perfect foil to Trump. A change candidate that the nation craved, with a rock solid record, but the personality antithesis to the Republicans. Bernie Sanders.
And from that point on, with the energy I saw online, delving into communities of people I align with and also utterly disagree with, I knew the only way Trump wouldn't be President was if Bernie was the Democratic nominee.
Along the way, Hillary's campaign smeared him with bullshit and colluded with the media and the DNC to make sure she won... because it was HER TURN. Oh, and just kept giving time to the big funny joke of Trump. Somehow totally oblivious to the way this was lighting an inferno under his supporters and anyone opposed to Hillary. And no matter how much all us "misogynist, hater, Berniebros' warned Clinton supporters that they were in a bubble thinking she would win easily, they just called us over-sensitive whiners.
Bernie got pushed out of the DNC and Clinton supporters celebrated the soon-to-be Madam President and 'drinking our Berniebro tears'. Because we were the enemy, of course.
And I cried.
Ranted at my folks how I thought the DNC just handed Trump the Presidency.
Felt like I was taking crazy pills, in disbelief that the Clinton folks were so certain of victory.
And I've been despondent since August with this clawing at me.
I'm an absentee voter here in California. Got my ballots early and researched the hell out of everything. There were actually super interesting propositions and such this year. I had everything filled out except for the vote for President for like a week and a half. My dilemma being that I would either not vote for it, write in Bernard Sanders, or vote Hillary. The protest vote, the vote for the first perfect candidate I've had available in my life, or the fear vote.
I agonized that I should vote Hillary because I would have if I lived in a swing state.
Agonized.
Finally made the decision that I couldn't vote for the candidate whose campaign had guaranteed Trump in office.
I wrote in Bernie.
Being in California, my vote didn't really count in the primaries because we're counted so late.
Being in California, my vote didn't really count in the general because it will always go blue and not matter in comparison to swing states despite our importance to the economy and massive population.
Vulnerabilities.
I've never wanted to be wrong about something so much.
I desperately wanted to be proved wrong and Hillary win comfortably.
Watching the returns the night of the election was a slow collapse.
In this age where entertainment is everything. How was it shocking to anyone that the 'entertainment' candidate won?
The next morning, with the Correct The Record paid Hillary supporters having abandoned their iron grip on multiple political subreddits among other places on the internet, the Bernie folks were able to freely speak since the DNC without being downvoted into oblivion and buried. The sentiment over and over again, we tried to warn you. And even Hillary folks admitting to it. Apologizing for having shouted down Bernie people for being ridiculous and naive brats.
No pride whatsoever for predicting what was happening, but everyone reaching out to encourage fighting together now. There will be so much to fight against.
But I have no confidence in this going well.
Each of these administration appointments has drained me a little more.
Anti-gay, anti-evolution, anti-education, climate change deniers, Putin fanatics... a fucking circus of nightmares.
The Secretary of State will be the CEO of Exxon Mobil.
That one today...
I dunno, man.
That's pretty crushing.
I need to get back to working on things.
I'm otherwise doing pretty well.
Over the last year I've gotten my weight up well enough to exercise without feeling like I'm gonna black out or trigger a panic attack. I've been using the Nike Training app workouts for a few months. Getting really sore a few times a week and feeling stronger is a good change for me.
Having the psychological/emotional energy to work on art after this election is still really rough though.
I'll post lots more fun things soon.
Just needed to get this garbage out of my system.
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