A breath...

Immortal Coil

While I try to get myself to stop fiddling with the code on my final site for Dreamweaver I'll post my final silkscreen project. We had to use a photo-stencil for at least one run, at least four runs total, and we were encouraged to have it 'mean' something. Plus, it needed to be a 'photo-collage', so I used my own photos of flowers and trees. Mine is (1) the flat background, (2) a ruby lith cut for the yellow to green blend you see below, (3) screen filler to block out for the crimson to red blend, (4) and the photo-stencil printed with a green to brown blend for the overall design. Happy happy happy with the finished product. I had ten prints of the one posted above and they printed totally consistent.

Pardon the distortion of the design. It was windy outside when I took pictures and the paper was moving. The first image is accurate. I have only two prints of this green one, which I might actually like better than the red roses. Made some other variations, too. This marble down below with just the last run and some others printed on top of previous left-over backgrounds.

There it is... another science-related ode. I can repeat the advanced etching class only one more time and there is the rarely available advanced silkscreen class next Spring. Considering both of them, but I'd like to know exactly what pieces I would try to accomplish before taking them. We'll see.

It's hard for me to think about anything future-ish right now. The anxiety is a daily thing. It has completely derailed me from my already slow track. Trying to keep my s*** together.

Compiling...

 

The end of the semester nears. Two weeks to go. About a week and a half actually. Spread out all of my prints from silkscreen at home to put together the final portfolio. Feels rather nice to have a stack of prints almost two inches tall. Productive class.

Also working on final sites/assignments for CSS and Dreamweaver. More staring at code for hours. My eyes are hating me. They'll hate me more once I start playing Diablo III next week. Ha. I'm pretty well on top of my work, so I don't think I'll have to delay that fun. I'm more excited for it now. Not just because the release is nearer, but because I'm in need of the catharsis.

The last few weeks have been weird. I've always had anxiety issues, but it feels like my brain and body have totally betrayed me recently. Even normal daily things have suddenly become massive challenges. Had to step out of class yesterday to walk around the hall because I was freaking out so badly. Felt like I was going to pass out or have a heart attack and could not get my nerves to settle. Ugh. Part of the problem is that I finally got around to seeing a therapist, which I probably should have done a really long time ago. The sessions, being this focused, one-on-one, social obligation, where I'm required to talk at length about myself, are simply hellish. I pretty much feel like I'm dying the whole time and the dread of the next sessions weigh on my chest like an elephant. Feels bad, man. I think it's doing more harm than good at this point. I really don't know what to do about it.

Turning 26 on Tuesday didn't help. The number is like a punch in the gut considering I more closely resemble a 16 year-old with crippling anxiety.
...
Trying to stay positive. My fingers haven't had any swelling problems, which is kind of boggling. Also got my Art Scholarship results in the mail today. Got even more $$$ than I did in 2010, which is really lovely. Then there's Diablo. Oh, and my favorite person singer in the world is releasing his first solo album on the same day. The concept is wild and over-the-top and clearly inspired by his role as Death in Elisabeth. Intense. So, there's that to keep me going through the home-stretch.

Fixing...

 At long last, the sweet sweet violet closure. Glad to have that done. I only printed a few of them and they weren't registered as well as the violet-less ones, but still... HUZZAH! On the left is the only one I printed with the stencils flipped around and I think it looks kind of awesome.

w00t.

"...lungs that suck at being lungs..."

"Pain demands to be felt."

The alternative substrates project. Open subject matter. We just had to print it on more than paper; shirts, wood, stickers, etc. My design was inspired by 'The Fault in our Stars', by John Green. The main protagonist is a teenage girl with lung cancer. I wanted to do something with ribs/lungs and then something with a starry motif, which shows up repeatedly in the story. So I did this stylized constellation thing with the lungs. Pretty happy with the result. Also printed some variations with prints I already had from earlier projects. Originally, I wanted to integrate the text in the design, but I decided against it... 'Pain demands to be felt' is one of many memorable lines from the book.

The poor, mangled bodies of plastic basketballers littered the carpeted ground: here, a ball palmed by a disembodied hand; there, two torsoless legs caught midjump. Isaac kept attacking the trophies, jumping on them with both feet, screaming, breathless, sweaty, until finally he collapsed on top of the jagged trophic remnants.
      Augustus stepped toward him and looked down. "Feel better?" he asked.
      "No," Isaac mumbled, his chest heaving.
      "That's the thing about pain," Augustus said, and then glanced back at me. "It demands to be felt."

Again, I highly recommend reading it, as long as you have a box of tissues within reach.

 Here's John reading the first chapter on youtube.

Bumb ditch...

I stood on the curb beside the open bus door, waiting for a few riders to disembark. Standard practice I'm familiar with after taking the same bus for more than five years. The first out the door, a rough-looking older guy, stopped and turned directly toward me.
"Could you let me by?" Suddenly all gritted teeth and angry.
The only possible way I could have gotten more out of his way would be to put one ankle in the gutter and flatten against the side of the bus. To my left, the sidewalk was empty. The two kind elderly gentlemen who had ushered me forward to board first were waiting patiently by the bus shelter. There had to be at least five feet of open space in each direction from this guy's perspective. I stayed put, considering I had nowhere to move to, and gave him the double eyebrow raise of utter confusion.
After he got done glaring at me, he passed by--along the natural way anyone would exit a bus--and muttered pretty audibly...
"Dumb bitch."

Aaaaaalrighty then.
I was tempted to call him out on it, but the bus was late and it wasn't worth making myself, and everyone else, more late. Plus, there's a strong chance the guy wasn't all there--mentally. Lots of psychologically unstable people take the bus. He also had some odd scabby sores all over his face... so yeah. I wasn't about to provoke him further.
Oh, public transportation... how I love thee.

Yeehaw.
Silkscreen class more than made up for it though! It was a such a great day in the lab. Everyone had positive energy. Everyone was encouraging and having fun. Since our prof is up for review this semester, one of the other art teachers sat in to observe. It happened to be my first art teacher at the JC. Two semesters of art history... five or six years ago. I loved those classes and took the opportunity to tell her so. She's awesome.

Anyway, I'm rambling. I turned in my self-portrait. Six runs completed. Didn't have time for the last run, which would have been a dark outline in some places and would have made the pen in my hand show up better. I also rushed mixing my ink colors so they aren't exactly what I wanted. It's alright. I think it still works.

'In collaboration with the night'

The registration is a bit off for all the prints because I didn't realize my screen was shifting slightly in the clamps until I was halfway through the runs. Darn. Live and learn, eh?
I am content. ^^

I'll be including this in my scholarship portfolio submission, which I'll be working on all weekend. Exciting!

More monotypes...

The rest of the watercolor crayon prints...

 

 A severely cropped section of a Cezanne still-life.

A Fauvist landscape referenced from a photo I took locally.

Slapped this last abstract together in about 10 minutes while some other prints dried. Kind of a mess. XD

Yellcyenta!

 There it is. The product of my stencil failure. I badly want to cut a new yellow stencil and print at least one the way it was intended to be. I'm still so annoyed about it. Art-related mistakes don't ever bother me this much. I don't know what makes this different, but I feel like I need the closure on this print... sweet violet closure.

 After I printed my 12 violet-less prints, I played with the stencils a bit to fill the time. These prints makes me feel even stupider that I missed the violet, because there is obviously violet all over the place. The background here is one of those marbled prints I did for project #2. I printed the magenta stencil and flipped it around before printing the cyan. The waxy nature of the transparent base had an interesting effect on the transparent ink. Auras everywhere!

Three more followed. I printed the magenta stencil on a few sheets. Then I took all my cutting scraps and scattered them around. Printed it once in cyan, flipped the sheet around for the next, and added one more piece before printing the last. I like the result. They're playful and vibrant. I do enjoy the process. Printing is quite zen. I'm beginning to consider how I can continue to print on my own at home after the class--sustainably.

I'll be posting a few more of the watercolor crayon project prints before the weekend is out.

じゃね。

Ugh...

It was just one of those days.

It started with trying to finish my CSS homework last night. The padding went completely out of whack on a page and I still have no idea what is causing it. The work is technically easy. The problem is that we have to modify someone else's old, somewhat deprecated code. Trying to sort through 700+ lines of messy code for a simple assignment is no bueno. Because of the ridiculous amount of time it took to do almost nothing, I didn't get a chance to work on the next silkscreen project, which is a self-portrait (...that I'm severely lacking inspiration for, too). The bro called up in the midst of the coding hell, seeking help for his upcoming finals. Looks like I'll be sacrificing a Saturday to the badass sister goddess.

Didn't get enough sleep, ran late getting ready for school and power-walked in the finally winter-like cold rain. Then stood at the bus stop for 20 minutes in said cold rain, waiting for the very late bus. Power-walked/jogged through puddles to class, which I was sure I would be late to, earning a 'tardy'... a college class...with tardies. Made it to class before roll call! HUZZAH!

We had our critique for project #3, the CMY transparent layering dealio. I quickly became deaf to any praise when the Prof pointed out that there wasn't any violet in the piece. No violet. NO VIOLET.

NO FREAKING VIOLET.

I spent six hours cutting those three stencils and...

I CUT THE YELLOW STENCIL WRONG.

How it was supposed to look...minus the rage.

Yep. So after my heart had sufficiently shriveled into a raisin, I spent the rest of the class cleaning stuff and preparing stuff since I don't have a design for the self-portrait yet. TIME WASTE.

Having a really hard time getting over that mistake. Printed 12 editions of it and I was so happy with the result and I was done early. If I, or anyone else, had noticed that I didn't have violet I could've re-cut the yellow stencil and printed at least a few correct ones. But now it's too late and I failed the assignment. Ugh...

So frustrated.

I brought them home, so I guess I'll post my fail print soon.

*grumblegrumble*

Dissolving...

'Refresh'

 With my screen and equipment all sorted I dove right into project #2. Draw directly on the screen with water soluble crayons and pencils. Flood the screen with transparent base. Let it sit and dissolve for 5-ish minutes. Pull the impression. Clean the squeegee and pull until it transfers as much as possible. Done!

Left: The abstract was my first attempt. I happened to have some old Staedtler watercolor crayons that had been sitting in my room for 15 years probably. Ha! I wasn't sure if they would work so I went for something loose design-wise and thickly layered to test the limits. Turned out way better than I expected. Vivid and almost exactly as it looked on the screen. Some of the topmost black never transferred, but it was a good first test.

'Callas'

 Right: Spent a little more time on this one. I've wanted to do something with calla lilies for a long time. My mom likes them and I worked on it with her in mind. She likes purples, too, so that's the color scheme. I was a bit floored with how nicely it printed. Didn't lose much pigment. There was a little dry area in the top right that needed a little help. Otherwise... I like!

The process uses/wastes a huge amount of transparent base. One way to get a little extra mileage out of it is to swipe the leftover base (which is laced with dissolved crayon) over the screen and pull an impression. It makes some cool marbling effects. This last little square is a section of one I took. I got a few different ones. They'll be fun to draw over and use as backgrounds in various things.

Project #3 is back to paper stencils. We'll do a 3-color transparent piece. The transparent layers will form 7 total colors. One stencil each for the primaries: magenta, yellow, blue. Overlap will create orange, green, violet, and black. It's a little tricky because the colors are really similar in value. Yellow blends with the white of the paper. The orange is more like red-orange and blends with magenta. Blue and green are really close and the violet and mixed black are almost indiscernible. I spent a bunch of time in photoshop trying to figure out what to do. Ended up surrendering to a geometric thing, which isn't very original, but if I'm quick with printing it I can do something else. Spent about 6 hours today making design masters and cutting the yellow and magenta stencils out of mylar. My hand hates me right now... like... we're not on speaking terms. Lulz. It was already cranky from drawing with crayons, but whew. I know my neck is gonna feel completely crap, too. Fun. ^^

Ciao.

First screen shots...

Oooh! Pretty colorssssss!

 It hasn't rained more than a light sprinkle since the robin-fest. It's like late spring... continuously. Sunny. Warm. It's easily the warmest winter I've ever experienced. The ankle is improving, but still hurts. Now I feel like I have an alien foot. For the first time in 25 years I can't flex or point my foot without pain/limitation. Super weird.

After the first run of paper stencil prints we've just been preparing our own screens and equipment, which is quite an intensive process. I've just finished everything, as of yesterday. Next week I'll start project #2, which is a bunch of monotypes with water-soluble crayons/pencils. Should be interesting and colorful and the subject is completely open, so I might end up with six or more different prints along with some ghosts.

 Here is the result of project #1. The stencil was cut out of a sheet of mylar. I have twelve prints that look like the above. Below is the actual stencil with ink on it. It's essentially the inversion, which looks a lot better... *sigh* Too bad. I think I'll cut another one later on without using mylar. I could barely see/handle the stuff even with my fingers doing fine. Paper, ftw!

I'd take a picture of my whole screen rig, but the Prof is super anal about seeing, hearing, or getting a whiff of a cell phone. So that might not happen until I can get my ninja on.
Dreamweaver and CSS are just getting in gear. Both classes have really involved assignment structures and websites, so I'm still trying to settle in properly.

Peace.